50 above zero:Californians shiver uncontrollably. People in Boise sunbathe.
40 above zero:Italian & English tic;" cars won’t start. People in Idaho drive with the windows down.
32 above zero: Distilled water freezes. The water in Pocatello gets thicker.
15 above zero: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Idaho have the last cookout before it gets cold.
Zero:People in Miami all die. Idahoans close the windows.
10 below zero: Californians fly away to Mexico. People in Idaho get out their winter coats.
25 below zero: Hollywood disintegrates. The Girl Scouts in Idaho Falls are selling cookies door to door.
40 below zero: Washington DC runs out of hot air. People in Idaho let the dogs sleep indoors.
100 below zero: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Idahoans get upset because they can’t start the Mini-Van.
460 below zero: ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin scale.) People in Idaho start saying…”Cold ’nuff fer ya?”
500 below zero: Hell freezes over. Idaho School Districst will open 2 hours late.